Grief: An Experience in Learning and Leaning
Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you. Ps. 9:10, NIV.
When my father passed away two years ago, I was angry with God. Why did it have to be my father? There were other fathers He could take; why mine? I felt God had deserted me. Who was going to look after me? Who was going to help me provide funding for my school fees? Who was going to stand beside me through my adolescence? Who was going to teach me how to change my car oil? Who would give me away when I got married?
On Father’s Day I had no reason to go to the Hallmark store for a card. Neither would I have any reason to go to the men’s department store for a gift. Most of all, I missed having my father around and was furious with God. I couldn’t face the world alone! Why me? I wondered.
Jesus asked God, when He was nailed to the cross, why God had forsaken Him: “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46). And I asked the same question.
These past two years have been a learning and leaning experience. Learning that God allows trials and tribulations to attack us so that if we choose to let God help us, we can be stronger. And it’s been a leaning experience. In God I have found my solitude, peace, and hope. God has not forsaken me. He has always been my friend and partner.
I began reading the Psalms, because David had many of the same doubts I had. He could tell God exactly how he was feeling, get it out of his system, and turn around and praise God. I’ve learned that that is the answer to getting rid of the bitterness and finding healing. And the result is an intimacy with God that I never had before.
Currently I am working with hospice patients. I have had the opportunity to share my experiences with my patients and their families. God is using my personal experience to help my faith and be a witness for Him. And I can praise Him for that.
Have you been feeling that God has forsaken you? Tell God how you’re feeling, read His Word, and experience His healing.
When my father passed away two years ago, I was angry with God. Why did it have to be my father? There were other fathers He could take; why mine? I felt God had deserted me. Who was going to look after me? Who was going to help me provide funding for my school fees? Who was going to stand beside me through my adolescence? Who was going to teach me how to change my car oil? Who would give me away when I got married?
On Father’s Day I had no reason to go to the Hallmark store for a card. Neither would I have any reason to go to the men’s department store for a gift. Most of all, I missed having my father around and was furious with God. I couldn’t face the world alone! Why me? I wondered.
Jesus asked God, when He was nailed to the cross, why God had forsaken Him: “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46). And I asked the same question.
These past two years have been a learning and leaning experience. Learning that God allows trials and tribulations to attack us so that if we choose to let God help us, we can be stronger. And it’s been a leaning experience. In God I have found my solitude, peace, and hope. God has not forsaken me. He has always been my friend and partner.
I began reading the Psalms, because David had many of the same doubts I had. He could tell God exactly how he was feeling, get it out of his system, and turn around and praise God. I’ve learned that that is the answer to getting rid of the bitterness and finding healing. And the result is an intimacy with God that I never had before.
Currently I am working with hospice patients. I have had the opportunity to share my experiences with my patients and their families. God is using my personal experience to help my faith and be a witness for Him. And I can praise Him for that.
Have you been feeling that God has forsaken you? Tell God how you’re feeling, read His Word, and experience His healing.
Used by permission of Health Ministries, North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists.
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